catastr0ph3 (catastr0ph3) wrote in therant,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

i hate florida

shut up...anybody who remotely likes florida just--please--go away.
i am ranting which means i care NOTHING for your input.
I hate florida.
i hate the 9,000 types of bugs and creeping crawling insectoid fuckers that live here--and i hate the motherfuckers who oh-so politely explain WHAT kind of beetle or roach i just smashed...
and i hate the flatness. i am living on a giant swampy pancake over run by inbred fuckheads from lower north podunk who's momma and uncle are auntie and grandpa, too.
trucks. why do you need a truck? here? why not just get a hovercraft?
do you redneck pissants have penises so miniscule that the only compensation your three brain cells can come up with is to own the biggest ugliest 4 wheel drive behemoth you can? Or is it the only way you can haul your wife's large ass over to her momma's on sundays before YA'LL git to church?
nonono--these are rhetorical questions. please don't answer.
I hate long flat straight roads without lights...miles of asphault winding out like a gray ribbon from hell...or to hell.
palmetto bugs, palmetto trees?
can't one of them get their own name?
back to those 3 brain cells.
i hate plastic pink flamingoes, the university of florida logo, this town and everything that even REMINDS me of it.
I was happy standing in the ocean yesterday. thought that odd because i was in florida....then i realized that i wasn't in florida when i am in the ocean.
a technicality, yes....but i cling to what little escape i may have.
driving back i was behind an SUV with a big ol' fluridoh gators logo on him's spare tire cover (the one on the vehicle--although i am quite sure he could have used it for the spare tire on his torso toooo.)
and i wanted to cry.
i wanted to stop the car.
i did not want to return here.
when i got back i looked at the front of my little white car...and lo and behold--at least a few hundred of those bugs were plastered to the front.
this made me feel somewhat happy also.
nope--no point...just spewing.
hates the nasty florida....hates it!
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.